I was sitting in the local coffee shop writing a few chapters of a book, when two ladies sat down at the table next to mine. Immediately, one of them said very loudly to the other, “Give me an overview of who you are.” She was holding a clipboard tilted toward her — pen poised — so the other woman couldn’t see it. The other woman sank down in her chair and crossed her arms. She gave a short, uncomfortable laugh, looked around, and then offered a very brief response I couldn’t hear.
I thought, “Well, at least her quiet response should encourage the other woman to speak more softly.” I was wrong. She continued firing off loud questions, most of which seemed rather personal and inappropriate. Occasionally she would laugh and offer some very personal information of her own for the rest of us to enjoy. I don’t think the interviewee laughed once.
I imagine both of these women are smart, interesting, and competent. But this was not my impression from observing their behavior. The loud woman clearly wanted everyone within hearing distance to believe she was in a position of power. Not someone I would want to work for. The other seemed timid and lacking in self-confidence. Not someone I would want working for me.
Most of us have been in both positions at different times in our lives. And most of us don’t care for either one. But approached properly, both provide an opportunity to exhibit real leadership.
As the interviewer, your two primary goals are: to determine if the candidate is a good fit for the position, and to get the candidate excited about the opportunity. Intimidation tactics and a need to promote your own importance will undermine both goals. A true leader will:
- Focus on the interview candidate rather than herself
- Be respectful, friendly, and professional
- Show interest and actively listen
- Use open-ended questions
- Allow time for the candidate to ask questions
- Let the candidate know what to expect next
At the beginning of an interview, yes, tell the candidate who you are and what you do. Keep it brief. I have been on interviews where the interviewer did all the talking and then offered me the job. Although the interview was easy, it didn’t give me confidence I’d be working with competent people. It made the job less attractive.
If the candidate seems nervous, sit on the same side of the desk or table so there’s no barrier between you. If you can put the candidate at ease, you’ll get more useful information because she’ll be more talkative and less guarded. She’ll also like you more — a great start toward achieving your two primary goals.
Have a written list of open-ended questions, but then actually listen to the answers. The answers will often lead you to better questions than you planned. Make sure you allow time for the candidate to ask questions as well. If a candidate doesn’t ask any, it could signal that they are unprepared, dispassionate, or unknowledgeable about the position. Finally, let the candidate know what to expect next and in what timeframe — and then follow through, whether or not an offer is extended. It is courteous to let people know the position is no longer available to them, and why.
As the interviewee, remember that an interview is a two-way process. Most people think the interviewer has the upper hand because they have the “job” to offer. But the job is irrelevant without the right person to fill it. You bring that to the table.
Adjust your attitude to an exploratory one. You already know you are good at what you do. You don’t need an interviewer’s approval to justify that. You also know there is a high probability that any given job is not the right one for you — you may not like the culture, the travel requirement, or the people. Most people have to go through several interviews to find the right fit. Look at it like marriage: very few people marry the first person they date.
A leader in an interviewee role will:
- Not be intimidated by a condescending or inconsiderate interviewer
- Exhibit confidence, respect, and a friendly, professional demeanor
- Be prepared — research the company and the people interviewing you
- Ask direct, pertinent, open-ended questions
- Find out what the next steps are and in what timeframe
Never cross your arms or slouch in an interview. Even if you are cold, it is better to say so than to communicate that you are defensive or closed off. At the end, confirm when you will hear back and ask for the interviewer’s contact information. Send a thank-you note. If you don’t hear anything in the specified timeframe, follow up.
Should the offer not be extended, a confident leader views this positively. You avoided getting stuck in the wrong job. You are one step closer to finding the one where your talents are recognized and valued.
Whether you are the interviewer or the interviewee: be yourself, be confident, and understand your purpose. Your leadership skills will shine.
I wrote this post in 2009, when I was doing a lot of hiring and a lot of coaching of people who were being hired.
What I notice now, twelve years later, is how little any of this has changed — and how rarely any of it is taught. The students I work with are smart. They can write a program, debug a function, and explain a data structure. But most of them have never thought carefully about what an interview actually is, what the person across the table is trying to figure out, or how to project the confidence they actually deserve to feel.
That’s not a soft skill problem. It’s a curriculum gap. And it’s one of the most expensive ones, because it only shows up when the student is already out the door and sitting in someone else’s conference room.
